In the book Give and Take Adam Grant explores the advantages of being a giver, taker or strategic matcher. I believe that his desire in writing the book is to convince more people to become givers or at least move closer towards becoming a giver. My favorite movie is Pay it Forward so you might expect that this book resonated with me. Grant ends the book by providing 10 actions for impact. In this article, I wanted to explore the action called starting a reciprocity ring.
Cheryl and Wayne Baker created the co-created the Reciprocity Ring, a fun and dynamic group exercise that applies the “pay-it-forward” principle to a team or group while creating and cementing high-quality personal and professional connections. The Reciprocity Ring is a one-time, face-to-face exercise that makes asking for and offering help easy. This is an exercise that was developed at the University of Michigan is now supported by an online application called Givitas.
The idea of a reciprocity ring is not new to me but I do like the name. I like the idea of having a formal exercise to help people become better at serving others. Some people might not be givers because they don't care enough, but most are likely takers or strategic matchers because they don't have the skills or have not experienced the joy of giving.
Today my friend Tim Dotterweich called me to thank me for introducing him to my friend S0ndra Schneider. Tim is in the staffing and recruiting industry and specializing in CyberSecurity. He is constantly looking to help those who are unemployed or underemployed. I connected him with my friend with S0ndra. She runs Security University and was able to provide advice on how to get free training for people who need to increase their job skills. I feel great because I had the opportunity to help Tim, S0ndra, and people I will never meet.
When I was at NetApp several members of my team including Adam Burton, Darren Nilsen, and Joe Dabrowski became very successful through formal and informal networking. According to Brian Uzzi management professor at Northwestern University networks come with three major advantages. 1. private information 2. diverse skills, 3. power. Jeff Cochran was part of their networking group and I later hired Jeff. The best "networkworkers" give first. "It seems counterintuitive but the more altruistic your attitude the more benefits you will gain from the relationship," says LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman. He says, "If you set up to help others, you will rapidly reinforce your own reputation and expand your universe of possibilities."
In the book Give and Take Adam Grant shares the story of Adam Rifkin, a silicon valley venture capitalist, and organizer of the 106 Miles Meetup. Rifkin has become known as a giver. For instance, as part of the research for give and take Adam Grant recorded that Rifkin had written recommendations on LinkedIn for more than 265 people, while 49 people had written a recommendation for him. While he has given more than 5x the number of recommendations he also has a large number of recommendations. I checked and noted that I have given 28 recommendations and have received 8. Is this proof that there is a correlation between how much you have given and how much you receive? Rifkin believes you should be willing to do something that will take you five minutes or less for anybody.
One way to practice the 5 minutes or less giving drill is to sign up to give free career advice on the LinkedIn Career Advice Hub
According to Grant, Rifkin believes in the strength of weak ties which is based on the study by Stanford sociologist Mark Granovetter. In this study, Granovetter found that 17% of people got a job through a strong tie and 28% of people heard about a job through a weak tie. In my opinion, great networkers stay in touch with dormant ties by consistently looking for ways to help. Are you doing this?
Also in the book, Grant refers to the work by researcher Katie Liljenquist. She has shown that asking advice is an effective way to exercise influence when we lack authority. She tested her theory through exercises where parties were negotiating the sale of commercial property and found that asking for advice from the opposing party lead to better outcomes. Ithai Stern and James Westphal studies executives and found that asking for advice after giving a compliment was a better way than just providing a compliment to solicit help in obtaining board of directors positions. Adam Grant believes that research shows that people who regularly seek advice and help from knowledgeable colleagues are rated more favorably than those who never seek advice or help.
Adam shares stories of Author and former CEO John Huntsman Sr. He believes that giving has been key to his success. In book Winners Never Cheat he says that "giving to others in need has been more satisfying than any deal he has ever closed. He believes that the more one gives the better they feel about it and the easier it becomes to give."
As a result of reading Adam's book, I have been encouraged to continue to be a giver and to work to become even better. I was also encouraged to be more willing to ask for help. What can you do to build your own reciprocity ring?